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Doree “the Gunslinger,” new member of the notorious Suc Gang, is wanted in five counties for stealing shopping carts from local establishments to, “carry her guns in.” Note that no member of the Suc Gang carries a firearm or any kind of weapon. One of her fellow Suc Gang members (often Lil’ Biscuit, the leader) will accompany Gunslinger to steal a shopping cart, at which point Gunslinger will hop in and shout, “Ya see these guns?! No tickets needed!” while flexing as they speed through the parking lot and down the street. She’s been known to kiss her “guns,” and reportedly, one is named Smith and the other, Wesson. Other times, she will push one of the members while screaming about how strong her “guns” are. She’s usually wearing a tank top. As with all members of the Suc Gang, she is considered a non-threatening nuisance. Businesses would just really like their shopping carts back, ladies. Please return them. Nobody needs a shopping cart sculpture on their lawn, and no, that does not a flamingo habitat make. Just, return them, and this can be over with. And no, no permit for your “guns” is required; we’ve been over this, Doree.
Scent Notes: A tart lemon meringue with a touch of vanilla. And gunpower. Because of course.
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