Love is a transitional state, which, according to nature’s plan, should ensure the transition of a being from the status of “lonely” to the status of “paired”. In the animal world, it never occurs to anyone to fix this temporary, transitional, service state forever. But we, people, want this, and we are very worried when the candy-bouquet period ends one day...
It is in vain that we demand from love what it cannot give us: that it be with us forever. We want to hold the moment of love forever. But this cannot happen in principle! Love cannot and should not exist forever. She must only do her job, set up the relationship between a man and a woman correctly and, closing the bedroom door, leave in shame. And you shouldn’t demand more from love than it can give! You just need to really value what she has already given you: the opportunity to create a family and give birth to charming babies.
Love is the central, basic feeling of a person. This is an oasis of happiness in the boundless sea of human suffering, but at the same time it is another source of this same suffering. What should a man and woman know about love, having already experienced mental pain after breaking up with a loved one, so that in the future they begin to behave more carefully and do not step on the mop of love again and again? To do this, they need to know about love itself, its functions, goals and objectives. That's what we'll talk about.
So, what is love between a man and a woman, what is the meaning of those (primarily unconscious) processes in our brain that can do both very good and extremely painful to men and women? Personally, in my practice, I am deeply convinced that love between a man and a woman is the starting element of a large natural-social construct called the “instinct of procreation.” In addition to love, it includes: love relationships, sex, marriage, having children, raising them, regulating relations around property, agreeing on mutual submission and control, etc. Despite the fact that love between a man and a woman is nothing more than one of the elements of this structure, it occupies the most important place in it. In computer language: Love is the “startup file” of the procreation program.
At the right moment in time, the love program will, as it were, “unarchive” those necessary files that are stored in the “personal on-board computer” of the human consciousness. It de-preserves, “unfreezes” this ancient program for the reproduction of our own kind, which is embedded at the genetic level in each of us.