Okay, let’s get one thing clear upfront: this scent in no way smells like beets. Because the only person who wants to smell like beets is Dwight, and nobody wants to *smell* like Dwight. Except maybe Andy Bernard and Mose. But if you fancy yourself a Schrute fanatic, like to pray outrageous pranks, you know that bears attack when you least expect it, or consider yourself somewhere between a snake, mongoose, and a panther on the speed scale, you’ll need Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica in your life.

Scent Notes: The musk of a real black bear that you fought with your own bare hands; fresh peach blossom (which is not as great as an Awesome Blossom, but does smell much better); honeycomb stolen straight from the mouths of the bumblebees (your apiarist owed you a favor); bubbles on a fresh glass of sparkling water, which ping about the glass like the laser guns wielded on the Battlestar Galactica. Glorious.